I’ve been meaning to do this post for a while. I remember seeing a blogging carnival for this back in the day, but my blog didn’t exist back then and I wouldn’t have been good at it anyways because I had a hard time judging anime back then. Remember when I scored Steins;Gate and After Story a 9 on my MAL? What the fuck was I thinking?
Okay, so what makes a 10/10 anime for me? Well, despite how I act, I’m kind of lenient on those to a fault. Not to the extent of Bobduh or anything, but a quick look at my top movie list where I score everything a 10 on my IMDB should make it clear that I don’t give 10s to faultless or perfect stuff or anything, and it’s not as hard for me to rank something a masterpiece as it is for other people. Hell, my most recent 10 (ignoring Kill la Kill because that hasn’t finished yet and it has plenty of time to fall off) was Urusei Yatsura, which started off kind of slow and given how long it is, a bunch of the episodes are obviously not going to be funny and just kind of die off.
So why did I rank it a 10? Because for a HUGE majority of its run, it appealed to my taste in comedies in practically every single way. The combination of characters (who I’ll mention another time), stories, animation, and weirdness gave me a huge rush at its best, and that best last for over a hundred episodes. It was practically my Gintama, and given how high that anime ranks on MAL despite starting off kind of poorly, I’m sure most people would understand why Urusei Yatsura is scored the way it is.
What I’m saying is that a 10/10 anime for me is basically something that caters to my taste in a specific way, and does it extremely well. Something that gives me a makes me go, “yeah, this is the reason why I absolutely adore anime” whilst installing a huge rush in me that my 9s don’t quite do. That’s pretty much it. Nothing too complicated. Nothing that requires a two-page essay.
Now, this may sound like I’m ruining the sacred name of “masterpiece” or whatever, but you have to keep in mind that most anime are terrible and they’re not being churned out in huge quantities the way movies are, so despite my lax attitude and all, there’s a reason why most of my “10s” are given to anime that are really old. Not to mention, my tastes are…um…kind of oldfaggy. And in this day and age, it’s hard to get anime that appeal to those sort of sensibilities, let alone done well. Although Kill la Kill has been doing a great job of it as I’ve said before, and Space Dandy should be pretty amazing.
But yeah, that’s my 10/10 criteria in a nutshell.
So what makes a 1/10 anime for me? Well, let’s look at some of the anime I score 1/10 on my MAL.
- Various NTR hentai that I’m not going to bother naming.
- Project ICE
- 6 Angels
- Hell Girl Season 3
- Da Capo Second Season
- BrainPowerd (dropped)
- Mouse (dropped)
Some anime probably irritate me more than those, but I’ve never scored them less than a 2, even though I don’t think I’ve seen anything as coma-inducing as the Garden of Sinners Epilogue and Odin. But despite them being some of the most banal things I’ve ever watched, the reason they don’t go to “1” territory is because I can at least say they’re well-animated. And considering that anime is a visual medium, that’s kind of an important thing to take into consideration despite what *shock* a bunch of anime fans say (you guys are terrible). Also, don’t even get me started on Hell Girl, which seemed designed to irritate the fuck out of me, but I forced myself to change their scores to a 2 (well, the first two seasons) because the directing was good and when it focused on the supernatural characters, it was mildly entertaining. That’s worth one more point, right?
Hell, I even rated the first Da Capo a “2” because the sidekick male was occasionally funny. And Kotori was a cool character that was tragically misused.
I give a “1” to anime I have literally nothing good to say about in any way, shape, or form. Nothing from the animation to the music to the characters are appealing in any conceivable manner. 6 Angels? Terrible in every way until the ending, was is just physically painful. The second season of Da Capo? The few things I liked about the first were gone, leaving me with nothing. Hell Girl Season 3? This one’s a special case in that the directing is still decent, but the fact that the show was completely unnecessary in terms of story overruled that fact. Jormungand? Worthless. Absolutely worthless. It boggles me that people shit on Coppelion so much – an anime I can at least say has good visuals – and yet give that piece of shit a pass.
So a “1” isn’t quite the opposite of a “10” for me like you’d probably expect. It’s not something that’s diametrically opposed to my tastes. It’s something that I just find has no value in any way whatsoever. Well okay, maybe it has value in regards to being put in some “how not to do it” guide. But otherwise, they’re better off being forgotten entirely.
On another note, I probably should have rated Melody of Oblivion a “1”, but I don’t remember it enough to remember if it deserves one. I was reminded of that awful “cow” scene though. Bleh.